the birds have nests, the wolves have lairs, but i can't find rest for me soul. i thought if i come to God, He will provide me the rest i needed, but even He failed me. Is He a man that He should lie? Is He a son of man that He should repent? Why has He said, but wont do, why has He spoken, and don't make it good?

It's coming to the midway of the covenant, but the clouds have just become so dark i cant see the way anymore. I am faithless. But i will tarry till the end of the term. Let me see if He is really who He said to be, and let me be a testimony.

My soul is not at peace... if i cant find rest in good, then let me find rest in destruction. At least there is destruction! Since that is what He made me to be - the abomination of desolation! Let sheol be my resting place, but i will gather the treasured ones of those around me, and tread on their tears to my own resting place. Not one left~